I miss me. The old me. The contented me. The bright me. The smiling me. The laughing me. The gone me. The me who didn’t see one of her hardest trials coming. It’s not that my life was ever perfect or pain free because it has never really been either of those things. No one’s ever is. But it was a known world, a quiet world, a world that had been accepted, a world from which a measure of wisdom had been garnered. And as long as I’ve lived I should have learned that we live in a constant state of flux in this world and so change is inevitable. There are always new lessons to be learned, new trials and tribulations, new insights to be gained, new purposes to be served. For the Lord has need of us and our gifts. And He knows we need to have our hearts softened again and again so that we continually yearn to hear His voice, read His Word, as well as trust and lean on Him and Him only for all our needs. Though we cannot understand much of the Divine mysteries, Yahweh designed us to seek Him and what more compelling catalysts are there than sleepless nights, relentless pain, and endless discomforts to drive us back under the shelter of His wings and near the sound of his still, small voice. And the undeserved blessing is that when we think we can’t go another step further, He is the strength and impetus that comes to help us keep putting one foot in front of the other. God is after all a good, good Father, and He doesn’t want to lose any of us even those of us who were once lost. Jesus always wants to bring us back into His keeping where hope lives, love lives, healing lives, and His grace upon grace sustains and saves us. So though these things above are gone for now, I’m living by faith that they will return even though I have one more week of radiation, which has been one of the hardest things to endure mentally, emotionally, and physically, to come my way, and there is yet another worrisome, even potentially life threatening, bridge to cross next month.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. ~Isaiah 41:10 ✝
**Photo and text by Natalie
***For those new to my blog, the radiation treatments have exacerbated my migraine headaches and restless leg symptoms that had previously been relatively under control with my medications. Since the radiation treatments have ramped them up, sleep has been very elusive and the pain from one or both has pushed into the range of nearly unbearable and I’ve maxed out on my meds.
This is beautiful Natalie 🙏🏼💜🦋
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Thanks MM❣️😘🌹
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You have a strong faith, Natalie…The Lord bless you and keep you in His loving arms💕
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Thanks Susan❣️😘🌹
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If ever I am in such a place, I hope I will remember this strength, this love, of Jesus you shine your light upon, brighter than you know and feel. I’m envisioning angels holding you, comforting you, and lifting you up as needed. I’m praying you feel some relief soon and that you know how cherished you are.
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Thank you so much JoAnna. It means a lot to me that you guys care❣️😘🌹
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Certainly. We care very much. ❤ ❤ ❤
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Thanks sweetie❤️❤️❤️xoxoxo
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Welcome, Ma’am. 😉 ❤
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😘❤️😘❤️🌹
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Oh, dear… what’s next month, dear Natalie?! Praying and praying!!!!! 💜💜
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When I had my stroke six years ago they noticed some nodules in my lungs but they were ruled benign. When they did the x-ray before my breast surgery they noticed a new and somewhat bigger nodule in the upper right area
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When I had my stroke six years ago they discovered some nodules in my lungs. Those were ruled benign. But when they did an x-ray prior to my breast surgery they found a new and somewhat larger one. Since my tumor was HER2 positive there is a chance that it could’ve jumped ship as it were and gone elsewhere in my body. So they are watching this new nodule and will do a CAT scan in August and if it’s growing it could cancer that came from what was in my breast. Our prayers are that it is another benign one. But I won’t know for sure until at least August when the CAT scan is done and I see the oncologist again. Thanks for your concern and prayers❣️😘🌹xoxo
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Overwhelming love to you Natalie,
which is basically what God gives us all,
as you well know.
But He does it so much more powerfully and perfectly.
I asked my son the eternal question,
“Why does God let us suffer?’
He answered, “Because we are all souls and spirit of him, and where we are going is where we belong.”
My son’s name is Matthew
You are channeling God, for us, Natalie.
Thank you.
And of course, you know,
you never walk alone.
And that doesn’t even take into account all the people who love you.
Like me.
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He allowed His own son to suffer for our sins. It is just a part of life here on earth and it’s meant to bring growth and and dependence on God, the giver of all life. He uses it to gouge out our souls until He gets to the really good and useful “stuff” much like we carve out all the goo and seeds to get to the meat, really good stuff, in a pumpkin. I know I never walk alone Cindy but I tend to wander at times and my Shepherd has to come pull me back into the flock. I may not survive what has begun in my life now but He has something for me to do for Him as I walk this valley. And I’ll do my best to do that! Thanks for you caring and love! It means the world to me❣️😘🌹xoxoxo
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“but I tend to wander at times and my Shepherd has to come pull me back into the flock. I may not survive what has begun in my life now but He has something for me to do for Him as I walk this valley. And I’ll do my best to do that!
It is not at all simple, or easy, is it?
But it is profound and so important.
You will guide us, with God’s help.
You just are an amazing person. So intent in bringing hope and love to others. So completely in accordance with what Jesus said he hoped for from human beings.
Psalm 23 has been my most comforting, since I was a child.
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Thanks so much for you encouraging comments and prayers my dear sweet friend❣️😘🌹xoxoxo xoxoxo xoxo
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I woke up a few minutes ago and thought I would get on facebook for a few minutes before going back to bed. The link to this post was right there at the top.
Oh, Natalie. 😦 ❤
I am praying!
It is almost 2 am. I do my best praying this time of the night.
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Thanks so much Theresa❣️😘🌹
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Thanks for sharing your true self. You are rich in spirit and brave too Natalie. I’m thinking about how you love color and couldn’t get the True Colors song out of my head…
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow
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Awwww that’s so sweet Liz! Thank you! I’ve never been one to hide much of anything what you see is what you get. Blessings and hugs,❣️😘🌹xoxo
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This is inspirational, Natalie
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Thank you dear sweet Derrick❣️😘🌹
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You are held with such love, Natalie. Sending you healing energy and the feel of nature. Derrick said it, this is inspirational and courageous. xXx ❤ Xx
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Thanks so much Jane❣️😘🌹xoxoxo
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Dearest Natalie, A beautiful and inspirational post. We walk this road together, lean on me, my dear friend. We will make it to the finish line together. Hugs.
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Thanks so much dear sweet Patricia. I pray that we both do make to the finish line! Blessings love and hugs❣️😘🌹xoxo
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We will, Natalie. xo
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Yes we will sweet lady❣️😘🌹xoxoxo
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This is a beautiful post, Natalie. I pray for these treatments to work, and for you to find the strength and comfort that you need to endure the pain and stress.’
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Thanks so much Dan❣️😘🌹xoxoxo
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XOXOXO
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Thanks Bear❤️❤️❤️
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The true ministry of Christ will always be found in our honesty. Only love can make a heart vulnerable – and strong at the same time. Great blessings and grace be your portion.
Praying for you.
Brian
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Thanks so much Brian! I so appreciate your comment❣️😘🌹
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My heart, love and prayers go with you … as our Father God sustains you day by day and moment my moment, dearest Natalie.. ❤ xoxoxoxo
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Thanks so much my sweet Bette❣️😘🌹xo
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Beautiful written, dear Natalie. I haven’t stopped praying for you. Heaven’s hearing from all the friends that love you, sweet one. ❤ Gentle hugs. Thank you for giving to all of us even as you suffer.
Blessings of peace, provision, and restoration ~ Wendy Mac
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Thanks so much dear Wendy❣️😘🌹xoxoxo
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Beautiful — we are complete in Him. God’s wonderful keeping, dear Natalie 🙂 xo in Jesus
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Yes we are Susan! Thanks❣️😘🌹xoxo
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Sending you Love and Light, Natalie. May you see this through and emerge whole and new. xo
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Thanks so much Eliza❣️😘🌹xoxo
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Only Jesus knows and understands our inner hearts and travels alongside theough everything. Blessings Natalie. You may come to discover and become happy with that new person more than you think right now. You are in my prayers
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Thanks so much Pete❣️😘🌹xoxoxo
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still praying Natalie
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Thanks Julie❣️😘🌹
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Dear Natalie. I’m sorry for your pain and challenges, but inspired by your faith and courage to keep trusting and opening to deeper understandings. Sending love, prayers and blessings.
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Thanks so much Brad❣️😘🌹
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You are most welcome Natalie. 💞🙏🏽
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😊❤️
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He has revealed Himself to us!
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Yes every day in every way❣️😊
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Well, that sucks LMS. So sorry to hear about your breast cancer. Although I see that you’re still hanging in there with grit and stoicism. You just have to wonder how much a body can take. Knowing you I’m sure you’ll soldier on and take everything that life throws at you with decorum and courage.
Sir L.❤
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Yes it does Sir L!!! Big time!!! Thanks for the vote of confidence! Love and hugs❣️😘🌹
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You are a Vessel that carries HIS Message. You are a strong warrior. You have poked my heart! So many times. Praying for you. 💕
By the way do you follow Bill Sweeney ‘s blog? Like you, his posts are so inspirational. 💕
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Thanks so much for the prayers and lovely comment❣️ I’ll check out Bill’s blog! Thanks for the tip! I pray all is well with you and yours❣️😘🌹xoxoxo
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It’s called unshakable hope. 😘👍❤️
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Yes it is❣️😘🌹
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Bill’s blogs name is-named Unshakable Hope. ☺️
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Oh thanks!!!❤️❤️❤️
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Glory, thnx. May God continue to lift you up.
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Thank you❣️😊🌹
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COUCOU NATALIES
J’ai un jardin enchanté
il n’est pas très grand
c’est un petit coin mais ; il t’est destiné
Tu peux t’y reposer, même cueillir quelques fleurs
que j’ai fait pousser avec tout mon cœur
Certaines sont très gaies, parfumées et très colorées
D’autres sont petites, insignifiantes et peu odorantes,
Dans mon jardin, tout est utile
tu peux y trouver une source de réconfort.
de l’amour , de l’amitié si désiré et surtout d’être écouté
je te souhaite une belle journée ou bonne soirée
Belle semaine et plein de bonnes choses pour toi
je te fais de gros bisous.
Bernard
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